book- feelings

(Place on page 100 after para 2)

You may be wondering about sex. I know I would  if I was reading a story about a guy with brittle bones who claimed to have girlfriends. As much as Mom wanted me to be a priest, I had feelings like any other guy. When I found Fox she taught me a lot about sex since she was the experienced one. I was scared at first, especially because of my bones. But we explored and found out what worked and it turned out to be fun. A whole new world was  opening up to me.

My overall physical condition was getting stronger since my days as a kid when a simple sneeze would cause a fracture. I still had to be careful but Fox was aware and gentle, as were future girlfriends.

To be honest, I always liked cuddling, hugs and the intimacy part of sex most of all. Feelings of being wanted and needed were big to me. It still amazed me that a woman ( attractive women at that) would find me attractive too. All I had to do was look at my battered legs to get discouraged. But I was soon learning that certain women were interested in much more than what my legs looked like. Much more!

 In the future I would admire the great Christopher Reeve and his openness about disability and sex. He showed the world that just because one had a  physical challenge didn't mean  he or she should extinguish any natural  feelings or desires. With me, because my experience with women was so limited, it actually made me more sensitive, passionate and romantic when I did find a girlfriend. And when I fell in love with Jill and Holly down the road  the feelings grew even more intense.Love made the intimacy so much better.

For now, sex was fun and made me confident in life. I was growing by leaps and bounds, the innocence of my childhood fading away. I was becoming a man. More than showing  the world I was no different inside with my feelings, I was proving it to myself. I was no longer ashamed of having a disability. Despite the challenges, I could still enjoy life, feel good about myself, and say "Maybe I'm not such a monster after all."